Wednesday, June 22, 2011
The Helping Principle
One of the toughest principles is the helping principle. It could also be called the father's principle, the mother's principle, the ex-lover's principle, the friend's principle or any other principle with an appropriate adjective. Thinking about it, it seems to me it also could be called the God Principle. Whether we like it or not, each of us is programmed to help each other. Most of us are also Jack or Jill Average. This means that most of us will live in obscurity, be known only to our families and associates and when we die, unremembered except for our family on odd occasions. Thinking about it, the helping principle, to work effectively, requires you to have guts, fortitude, and the realization that there isn't any glory. The helping principle isn't about you. It also means that most of the time you will have to eventually let go, yet be available for any stumbles. One of the toughest components is the realization that you mustn't let them consciously realize that you are helping them. The helping principle demands that you, yourself, open up emotionally and empathetically. Another part, is that you can't screw up their life, for the self gratification of staying around. If you think that what I'm saying is all mostly airy – fairy just look at the social media. One of the social media's advantages is that you can make it private or eliminate friends. It is one thing in life to suspect that you don't quite measure up to someone's idea of perfection, but quite another to have to cope with the idea that someone's private doesn't include you and to rub it in you are no longer a friend or alas, moved further into the friendless column. One of the most debilitating aspects, is that you may be extremely sensitive to what is coming next, yet you have no chance of bailing. The easiest example, is the Christians that were thrown to the lions for their principles. I, like you, have principles, but if I were about to be thrown to the lions, I'd start to think that maybe I should have been slightly less principled. I'm a Christian. You may be of another faith, but the principle may be the same. One of the people in my faith is Jesus Christ. The older I get, the more I suspect he had more guts than most of us will ever have. I sense that God told him what was going to happen in excruciating detail and that furthermore, that he had no choice in the matter. I'm told that Jesus spent 40 days in the desert but the Bible doesn't say why. I sense that Jesus wanted to discuss what was coming and was it absolutely necessary that he had to do it. Perhaps, Jesus pointed out to God that he wasn't particularly qualified. I, sad to say, am following in Jesus' footsteps. I'm telling God that I'm too old for The Helping Principle and she's telling me, that I've got too much experience to retire. God is going to be the death of me, yet.