Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Male / Female Primer

1. The female calls the shots / makes the rules.

2. The rules are subject to arbitrary change at any time without prior notification / logic.

3. The rules are too complex for simple male minds.

4. If the male should inadvertently learn the rules or the female suspects the male knows all the rules, she must immediately change / randomize some or all of the rules .

5. The female is never wrong / the male is never right.

6. If the female is wrong, it is due to a misunderstanding which was a direct result of something the male did or said wrong or even worse, didn’t anticipate.

7. If Rule 6 applies, the male must apologize immediately for being insensitive.

8. The female may change her mind at any time without notice.

9. The male must never change his mind without the expressed written consent of the female which he’s not going to get in a month of Sundays..

10. The female has every right to be angry or upset at any time. No reason is required.

11. The male must remain calm at all times, unless the female wants him to show concern / remorse. She expects you to know when. So pay attention.

12. The male is expected to be a mind reader.

13. The male who doesn't abide by the rules, also doesn’t understand / appreciate / is incapable of a serious relationship.

14. Any attempt by the male to document the rules shows a lack of trust / faith on his part.

15. If the female has PMS, everything is off for the foreseeable future.

16. The female is ready when she is ready. Never irritate her by asking if she is ready ( yet ).

17. The male must be ready at all times.

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