Bush vs. Kerry

Well boys and girls what will we do now???? We’ve heard the debates, we’ve seen the advertisements, we’ve listened to the rhetoric. What does all the foufou come down to???? I don’t know about you but in order to have better jobs, improve the economy, end outsourcing, etc., etc.…… you have to be alive. Now I realize that Kerry has fought in Vietnam, has 3 Purple Hearts, and appears to be a nice guy. The downside is that Kerry got involved in the anti-war protest and testified before Congress. Bush, on the other hand, joined the National Guard. Other people fought in Vietnam, and did there level best but they’re not running for President. Pretty well Even Stephen to me. Kerry tells us he will wipe out the terrorists. Bush tells us he will wipe out the terrorists. Bush has on the job experience at wiping out the terrorists which must count for something. Bush has management experience which must count for something. Kerry, as far as I know, has had no management experience, but may have management potential. As far as I can see, the terrorists don’t intend to make my life pleasant in the foreseeable future. On the balance of probabilities, and the fact that when the rubber hits the road, I want to live my only rational choice is to vote for job and management experience. May my God forgive me as I hold my nose and vote for Bush!!!

How Many Prime Numbers ????

I got to thinking about prime numbers the other day. A prime number is any number that can only be divided evenly by itself and 1. For example the numbers 11, 13, 17, 19, 23, 29, 31, 37, 41, 43 are all examples of prime numbers because they can only be divided evenly by 1 and themselves. If you look at the first digit in column 1 of any prime number you will see it will only contain the numbers 1, 3, 7, 9. The other numbers in the columns after the first column will have 10 choices of digits from 0 to 9 (0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9). Take any random number and add 1,3,7,9 to it. The new number is probably a prime. Divide it by all the preceding numbers to see if it is a prime. Therefore in a 10’s based number system the number of available digits to put in a column is 10 numbers. Since the prime numbers end in 1,3,7,9 which are 4 numbers out of the available 10 digits then the number of prime numbers is about 4/10 of the total numbers or approximately 40%. Unfortunately numbers ending in 9 are not always primes (39 for example) but the numbers 1,3,7 are always primes. Since the prime numbers ending in 1,3,7 are 3 numbers out of the available 10 digits then the number of definite prime numbers are about 3/10 of the total numbers or approximately 30%. Therefore the number of prime numbers are between 30% to 40% of all the integer numbers (1, 30, 40 etc.).

How Do You Like Them Apples???

In my blog "Daddy’s Advice" I mentioned that dear old dad said "If you want to be successful, study someone who is successful." After looking around I decided that the only truly successful person / being / whatever depending on your belief, culture etc. was God or his equivalent. The more I thought about God the more I realized he / she / whatever was the originator of the KISS principle (Keep It Simple Stupid). God has based the universe on simple principles , that are essentially maintenance free, capable of evolving on their own, and are the bricks for more complicated structures in life, relationships, events etc.. I’m no scholar, but it occurred to me that if you looked around at the various disciplines such as Chemistry, Physics, Astronomy, Business, Relationships, etc. they all primarily emphasized something that could be useful to solve something elsewhere with a few minor changes to fit the situation. Here’s an example: Scientists have recently confirmed that Earth's spin warps space around the planet. If space is warped so is time. They call the effect Frame Dragging. Any object with mass warps the space-time around it, in much the same way as a heavy object deforms a stretched elastic sheet. Hell, anyone that has ever worked knows that !!! For instance: Your boss tells you to have an important package delivered to the business’s most important client by 5:00 p.m. Your boss thinks it is a big deal ( big deal = big mass). You have from now to 5:00 p.m. to get it there ( frame contains item to be dragged). The package doesn’t get there by 5:00 p.m.. Boss is as mad as hell at you. Boss thinks it is a big deal. (lots of mass). Bosses anger (mass) warps the space-time fabric of your existence ( time drag is indeterminable while boss yells at you). Your space is warped (shortened time to fix the problem if you don’t want to ruin your career / be fired). Therefore your personal life is in a space-time warp with Frame Dragging (will problem ever be resolved??). For the mathematical inclined here is some formula to keep in mind:
Space varies as to 1/event. ( Shorter the allotted space to the importance of the event).
Time varies as to 1/event. ( Shorter the allotted time to the importance of the event).
Force varies as to event. ( The amount of force allotted is proportional to the importance of the event).
Energy varies as to event. ( The amount of energy allotted is proportional to the importance of the event).

The Love Signal

Back on August 21st , in a blog titled "Life & / Or Success Needs Lies To Function" I mentioned that our brain works on the principle of pattern analysis or management by exception. For instance, If you walk down the street you automatically notice the person that is not conforming to standard patterns whether it be in the physical or mental realm. Another way to look at it is to say that our mind is wired for stereotypical or patterned thinking based on statistical analysis of a group of objects. The best way to demonstrate this principle is contained in the question "How do you tell when someone of the opposite sex is attracted to you"? Simple question, but hard to answer. Basically, each sex has to learn to send out the proper signal which is most likely to be received by the intended target (boy / girl) without causing other receivers (boy / girl companions) to pick up and create "noise" that causes the the intended receiver (boy / girl to respond in a manner to protect her standing with her boy / girl companions. In other words, subtlety at all costs. The best way if you see someone is to reconnoiter first and try to come up with a way to "casually" meet him / her in an innocuous way as possible without raising alarm bells. For instance, if he / she frequents a book store stand close to him / her without invading his / her space and then casually pick up a book and off handedly make a comment (fake like hell) that can allow a conversation to continue if he / she thinks you are worthwhile. Another way is to borrow your friends dog if he / she has a dog and walk the dog right past him / her. Usually you can come up with a comment on how nice his / her dog or if all else fails subtlely allow the dogs to become involved so that he / she is forced to talk to you. If completely disperate get the dogs entangled with each other and at least have some fun. If none of these ruses are possible try meeting him / her while out walking, saying hello to begin with and gradually adding words as you continue to meet him / her. The last problem is how do I know if I’m getting anywhere if his / her body language has left me clueless?? Subtlely look into his / her eyes. If the window to his / her soul is transmitting a "Your toast" message you have lost. If the window to his / her soul says "You’re interesting, but you need work" you’ve been accepted into his / her life!!

Love, Soulmates, And All That Jazz

Back in June I posted something on "Love". Somewhere in the piece I mentioned that there are three kinds of relationships being acquaintances, friends and soulmates. You can put most people in the acquaintance or friend category simply by eyeballing and talking to them. Soulmates are a different kettle of fish. Soulmates involve your soul which may be entirely different from your persona as a friend or acquaintance. I think the problem arises because when we are young everyone gets together and lies to each other in the name of "competition". If the "lie" is repeated long enough with the right amount of passion we start to believe it. We all eventually get old, mellow out, don't care, become too tired to lie, and generally let it all hang out or be "honest" with each other. Our Soul starts to break through and we become open to ourselves, others, and lastly to God. We also suddenly realize that we don’t know anything and God graduates in our mind from a "What Is There In It For Me God", to an admission that God is much bigger than we can imagine and we are indeed humble individuals that only exist because of God’s grace. We also start to realize that Jesus was God’s earthly demonstration of his love for us and if we pay attention and listen to God maybe in the great expanse of Random Chance and Consequences we can add something of value before we cash in our chips and if we are really hot find the plan that God left us to discover through interacting with Him.

One Of Life’s Nagging Questions

I got to thinking about Noah’s Ark this morning. The Christian Religion says Noah was told by God to gather all the animal pairs together and put them in an Arc because a gigantic flood was going to cover the earth. So far so good. I also have been reading a lot about the causes of homosexuality lately. It seems that contrary to popular belief homosexuality is not solely a lifestyle choice but rather the result of the wrong genes in the wrong place at the wrong time. Essentially the result of randomness which is a part of our existence. I also read somewhere that homosexuality is not confined to us as a species but also exists in the animal kingdom. I think it is about 10% of the population. Assuming God simply told Noah to gather all the animals in the Arc by a certain date and left it up to Noah to work out the details, then how did Noah select the animal pairs that had the inclination to reproduce???

Bare Bones Of Life

We all have different adventures and believe certain things but when the bare bones of life are examined this is how it works. We arrive with nothing, accumulate like hell, go over the top realizing most things are meaningless including your career and promotional opportunities, down the other side where your possessions are graded for function like bathroom handholds and finally out the door and you can't take anything with you. The final indignity is that you have to explain to God / Fickle Finger Of Fate what you accomplished and he knows when you are lying. If you don’t believe in anything after death you still get it in the ear. Is there irony here or what????

1, 2, 3 Personalities

I belong to the Christian Faith and in that Faith we are taught there is one God of the universe who has disclosed himself in three distinct personalities. They are the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. I’m not familiar with other faiths but maybe you have something equivalent based on the number 3. God the Father is usually seen as the Creator of the universe. God the Son is Jesus Christ .God is also the Holy Spirit. Only the Holy Spirit can give us the ability to believe. God is the ultimate complicated Being to understand. God really doesn’t need us for his existence. God has an immense capacity for love and that is why you and I probably exist even though when push comes to shove we don’t deserve to be here. God the Son became human so we would have a three dimensional illustration of God. God the Son literally went through hell for us, died a horrible death and then rose again as a Soul to sit on the right hand of God. God the Son showed us what could be accomplished if we got a grip on ourselves and got down to work and quit fooling around. God the Spirit is the personification of God’s Love as demonstrated through his love and treatment of Jesus following Jesus’ 3 dimensional death. God the Spirit is the reality of God’s Love towards the Soul which is part of every living creature / thing in this Universe. I suspect when the rubber hits the road that God is us in disguise!!

God Does "Interesting"

In my Blog "Ain’t God Clever" I mentioned that in addition to Objects and Structures, God had to make life interesting or we would all get bored . God did "interesting" by inventing Time, Gravity, and Randomness. Universe Time never stops and moves only in one direction which is forward. You may stop doing something but that doesn’t stop the forward March Of Time. We all experience this phenomena in the workplace. This is why your Manager yells at you, along with your customers and other assorted Objects. Gravity is something that tends to keep things in place so Objects don’t go wandering off Willy Nilly. Do you remember the old phrase "Everything In Its’ Place and A Place For Everything" or "Neatness is close to Godliness." Typical motherhood statements used to restore order or what passes for it. Randomness is designed to keep things interesting. That is why we don’t know when the next set of truck headlights is due or when our favorite stock is going to tank. This is why nobody can "Time" the market accurately. This is why "Past Performance" is not indicative of future results. This phrase is usually applied to the Stock Market but also could be applied to certain situations after you marry, however, that is another Blog subject. If the Randomness Do Do starts it only lasts over about 3 cycles of things happening. There may be a problem with the length of Time associated with Random Do Do but it won’t be covered in this Blog.

Ain’t God Clever

This universe seems to need 3 essentials. First of all we have objects which are like single particles. Objects can be constructed out of a lot of neat stuff and do interesting things. Something like you or me for example. The second thing is structures. Structures are needed because the Objects have to be put in, on, or close to something. The third thing is that you have to have something interesting going on or the Objects (you and me) will lose interest. This involves Free Choice and its’ downside, Randomness. If you have too much randomness then total chaos is the result. This means that have to have an Attractor that will bring Randomness back into line. The Attractor in this Universe seems to be 3. Most things that involve you and me doing stuff, the Arts such as painting, Work, or even Construction are based on the number 3. Even mathematics, based on the Power Of Three, is attracted back to 3 as I demonstrated in my Blog "God’s Favorite Number" as in (3X3X3 = 27, 2 + 7 = 9, 3X3 = 9, 3 is the square root of 9). Gee, ain’t God clever!! He has the KISS principle by using the smallest number to make the universe work, he has given us Free Choice, and lastly has given us 3 dimensions to give us lots of room to move in and do our own thing!! Then after all that, some of us Objects still say "God Doesn’t Exist." H-mmmmmmm.

Stupidity Is Important In Life

There comes a time in everyone’s life when you finally realize that you aren’t the sharpest tool in the shed. If you have a philosophical bend you can express it as wondering if you are naturally stupid or do you have to work at it?? Anyway even the most careful of us sometimes live life on the edge. Today was one of those days!! I took a cracked tea cup out of the cupboard and filled it with hot tea this morning. This was my start of living life on the edge for today. I started to drink it and all of a sudden the tea cup finished cracking and spilled its’ contents into private parts that won’t be discussed in this blog!! Have you often noticed in your own life that some of the best things in life are discovered through stupidity??? For instance Goodyear discovered the vulcanization of rubber when he spilled some concoction on the stove. Someone else invented Velcro after he stupidly walked through nettles and they stuck to his pants. I suspect that stupidity is just another form of deterioration. Everything that has to do with life deteriorates over time. The prime example is that we all get older. I bet even in your own life you have done something stupid and benefited from it.

God’s Favorite Number

I have always been fascinated with Quantum Mechanics. Only heaven knows why. I seem to have a natural philosophical insight into things but no aptitude for proving it mathematically. Mathematicians, on the other hand, can solve anything mathematically but can’t come up with a decent theory / explanation. Anyway, while surfing the net I came across this little gem: "Physicists have so far identified 57 species of elementary particles. In particular, the Standard Model contains quarks and leptons, grouped into three families that differ only in their masses. Why the pattern of particles is repeated three times with enormous variations in mass but with other properties seemingly identical is an open question. Quantum physics has shown that three families are the minimum necessary to accommodate CP violation in the Standard Model. Such CP violation is necessary for matter to predominate over antimatter in the universe, but its’ effects observed so far are insufficient to explain this predominance." Here we go again: grouped into three families that differ only in their masses, three families are the minimum necessary to accommodate CP violation in the Standard Model, physicists have so far identified 57 species of elementary particles. All I know about CP violation is that if it didn’t happen you and I would never have gotten our personal show on the road!! God’s favorite number is 3 and 3 is the major universe attractor leading to stability over time. Here are some fascinating things about 3! If you take 3 and multiply 3 X 3 any number of times (Power is number of times 3 is multiplied) you get an answer. If you add all the digits in the answer together until you get one total occupying one column you get 9. 9 is 3 X 3 or stability. Physicists have so far identified 57 species of elementary particles. If you take 3^5=243 and 3^7=2187 and then multiply 243 X 2187 you get 531441 which is equivalent to (5 + 7 = 12 or 3^12!! Fascinating wot????

3 multiplied 5 X = 243, (2+4+3) =9
3 multiplied 7 X = 2187 (2+1+8+7) = 18 = (1 +8) =9
3 multiplied 12 X = 531441 = (5+3+1+4+4+1) = 18 = (1 + 8) = 9
243 X 2167 = 531441

Daddy’s Advice

Daddy only gave me one piece of advice: "If you want to be successful, study someone who is successful." Sounds simple but it isn’t!! The problem is what exactly is a successful person?? Is it someone who is a famous religious person?? Someone who has done great things for humanity?? Someone who has accumulated a lot of money?? Generally speaking in our me centered world, with the devil take the hindmost philosophy it is someone who has accumulated a lot of money!! I remember reading somewhere that a rich person once said that money was only a score keeper that measured your progress in the business world. The problem is that we only have stewardship of that money for a limited period of time and once we die we have to give it up. Doesn’t sound much like success to me!! Anyway I thought about it for awhile and the only successful person I know is God. God is the beginning and the end so he is likely to be around when you need him. God designed this universe and on the whole he has made it interesting for us if we care to get involved. He is the original inventor of the KISS principle (Keep It Simple Stupid). God has based the universe on simple principles , that are essentially maintenance free, capable of evolving on their own, and are the bricks for more complicated structures in life, relationships, events etc.. God is approachable and reasonable if you are nice to him. God has time for you if you accept the fact that he might not get back to you right away. God has given you a brain and expects you to use it. God wants you to put some sweat equity into the relationship. God has given you Free Will but the downside is you have to deal with the consequences if you screw up. Sometimes he will get you out of your personal pickle and other times he will let you sweat for awhile. God also improves your listening skills. He’s not one to give you a laundry list of things to do that day, but he does expect you to listen for hints in the form of events that come your way and things people say to you that have originated with him. Come to think about it he is a famous religious person, has done great things for humanity and as far as money is concerned, who cares, because God has a plan for you if you will stop whining and pay attention.

Trinity

I’m haunted by Art and believe me, I’m no artist!! I never got past the colours red, white, and blue, however, I must admit I finally managed to colour between the lines in about Grade 5 or 6. My current angst over Art started about 3 weeks ago when the Fickle Finger Of Fate got me sneakily standing in front of a portrait by an artist which was simply haunting. I read somewhere that portraits were the original camera or digital picture of a person or person(s) and it is certainly true if you happen to hit a first rate artist. If you have been reading my blogs you will notice that I have become rather obsessive about the number 3, so you will be relieved to know that I have got off that topic and moved on to numbers 1 and 2. The most famous portrait in the World is the Mona Lisa. 1 solitary image on a dark background!! In Art you could almost say that 1 represents the solitary that brings one’s soul into the painting to wonder about things that can only involve the soul and the speculative future. If we move onto 2 things such as a distant sail boat on a lake or ocean or a young girl staring out onto a lake we enter into a sort of intimacy. You have the same effect if you stand in front of a painting or sculpture of Christ on the Cross. 2 intimate things. You can’t help but be drawn in and become intimate with the painting or wonder what was going on in Christ’s mind at the time in a thoroughly intimate way!! It is probably the closest some of us will ever get to God in a personal, intimate way when push comes to shove or the old rubber has to hit the road. 3 things in a picture related to each other by the artist brings stability and by extension peace. The ultimate 3 or trinity, of course, is the painting, the artist and the viewer!!

Newton Simplified

I don’t know about you, but I can never seem to understand all those laws they put in physics books. Take old Newton for example!! In my blog "How Was This Universe Designed??" my central theme was that just because God is all powerful and can do things lickety split he is like the rest of us as far as being saddled with a bunch of extra work. God has been around long enough to realize that if you don’t want to go to a lot of work, you have to have something that is as simple as possible, essentially maintenance free, able to evolve on its’ own, and with some changes applicable to everything in sight. For instance, Newton didn’t have to have an apple hit him on the head to develop his Laws Of Motion. All he had to do was analyze his home life!!
Newton's first law of motion states that an object continues in its state of rest or of uniform motion unless compelled to change that state by an external force.
Home Life: If you sit all day on the couch (inertia) you don’t move. If you stay there too long father (an external force) is going to feel compelled to get you moving (change your state).
Newton's second law of motion states that if a net force acts on an object, it will cause an acceleration of that object.
Home Life: Father decides to take a boot to your ass (net force acts on an object) that will cause your ass to accelerate (acceleration of that object).
Newton's third law of motion states that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.

Home Life: Father has now accelerated your ass in a forward direction through the air. Ass follows an parabolic curve proportional to father’s boot (input) and starts to decelerate by getting rid of energy imparted by father’s boot (equal and opposite reaction) .

Little Children, Adulation & God

I was thinking about how little children idolize their older brothers and sisters. They are always tagging along and want to do something with you. They are always telling you how much they like you. After a while it generally drives you nuts!!! It suddenly occurred to me that we, as a collective group, are treating God exactly the same way. We idolize him by building great buildings in his honour. We tell him how great he is. We sometimes whine about not getting something and when that fails we lay guilt on him by saying "He has abandoned us". I don’t know about you, but if I was a God I’d be sick and tired of the lot of us by now. I have suspected for a long time that God is getting set to change things and here are a few comments about the train coming down the track. God will direct us. All we have to do is listen and talk to him on a regular basis. Sometimes he won't answer right away and sometimes he will set up a series of seemingly innocuous events to lead you in a certain direction. He will also sweat the details to make things happen like, huh, reaching into your heart where to all intends and purposes you should always remain as mad as hell about something. Don't get antsy if he doesn't reply to you right away. Don't forget God has been around for a hell of a long time and his time scale / future events schedule tends to be longer than what you and I might consider reasonable. If you want to do something don't hesitate to ask him as he might decide it’s a good idea and set it in motion long after you forgot about it and moved on to something else. He also happens to have a habit of not telling you what happened if he needs you to do something in a chain of events that doesn't necessarily involve you directly. He also works on a need to know basis and in most cases "You don't need to know". He also doesn’t need a lot of Generals but there is a need for Privates. So, "Welcome, to God's army!!"

Life Is A Glorified Bell Curve

I saw the Liberty Bell in the United States the other day and it suddenly reminded me of a Bell Curve and Life in general. Let’s see!! Most of us start out as a particle in a sack of water with three square meals a day and the garbage is taken out for us. We float in water which has got to be a pretty neat existence. Finally our little particle becomes a collection of particles in a three dimensional container or in other words a body. As usual in life, people and /or events aren’t satisfied to leave well enough alone and start stirring the pot as in Nature Abhors A Vacuum . The next thing we know our water tank has sprung a leak and some clown has grabbed our softest and most vulnerable part being the head with a pair of monstrous clamps. I suspect this is the basis of men in later life talking about someone grabbing and twisting their balls in some business situation and the ladies getting hot and bothered about breast pulling / fondling / touching. Anyway back to the subject at hand. You are born into a room that isn’t as hot as the one you left. No wonder you want to close your eyes, and cry. Most of us still do it when we can't believe it’s happening to us. The first stage of climbing the Bell Curve is the Accumulation stage. This involves, in the early stages, eating, drinking and pooping into the environment. Next comes learning at school, selecting a mate, career, accumulation of wealth, possessions, friends, ideas, dreams, business mentors. The next and shortest section is what I call "Over The Top." Your job is out sourced, you are unemployable due to perceived obsolescence, sex goes out the door, and your wife / husband leaves you to find herself / himself. The final section is the "Slide". Your body starts to droop, your possession’s importance is proportional to function. You start to notice that a whole lot of people are dying in your age group. Finally it dawns on you that you are getting close to "Out The Proverbial Door" Time. At this stage, you start to wonder if there is an after life. If you believe in God back to the Bible and some heavy thinking. If you don’t believe in God can you afford to take a chance?? I have a recurring dream in which I have died and suddenly I’m in front of God who says "Surprise, I do exist!!!

Mother Told Me Never To Scratch In Public

I woke up this morning with the horrible thought that Mom gave me a lot of bad advice. One of the most popular bits was to always change my underwear and wash my face. On the surface it sounds like a reasonable request but now I read in the newspaper that too much washing has lowered the immune system and all the antibiotics has created super bugs. Fortunately, I managed to revert to my original state just in time so I’m pleased to report that while no one wants to associate with me for obvious reasons, I’m in good health because most bugs are smart enough to tackle an easier target. Anyway, what really jars my preserves is the fact that mom never told me to scratch in public. On the surface this doesn’t sound like a big deal does it? Well, it seems that life generally goes from the particular experience, such as my boyfriend / girlfriend gave me the shaft, to the general wave, every boyfriend / girlfriend will give me the shaft. In other words from small acorns mighty oaks grow. Mom always told me to shut my mouth and listen so I might learn something. Sounds simple?? Yeah, right!! My whole working career went down the toilet because of mom’s advice. It seems that most communication starts and ends with a motherhood statement such as "Work hard and you will be successful" and /or "Management has its’ eye on you." I also like the phrases " It will be good for you" and "You’ll learn something." or "It will be for the greater good." If I had learned to scratch the motherhood statement I would have known there was a Blarney Stone supporting the motherhood statement in all its’ glory. What fascinates me, is how the politicians / pundits drop certain phrases / words if there is too much psychological baggage or the phrases / words have reached the great unwashed to such a degree that it is impossible to explain it away with a straight face and a sincere demeanor . For instance "Time Portioning" for "We’re always too late." There are also code phrases that are used to disguise less that socially acceptable ideas if spoken plainly. For instance, the time honored phrase "Well, what can you expect??" I also enjoy watching some news stations that repeat some "facts" with a perfectly straight face and with the sincerity that no man of the cloth has ever surpassed even though the facts were proved incorrect long ago. It also helps the "belief index" if it is repeated ad nauseum. It’s a pity that such talent should go unrecognized. Perhaps we could have a rewards program for the media with categories such as "Most believable newscast based on nonsense" or " Best / most Clichés in ten seconds or less."

Life & / Or Success Needs Lies To Function

Would society cease to function if the truth was known to everyone?? Mothers exhort their children to tell the truth . Children are generally punished if they don’t tell the truth. There once was a line in a movie in which the character says: "You can’t handle the truth!!". It is safe to tell the truth if it can be verified as in "Did you cut the grass?". Adults don’t tell the truth about Santa Claus or the Tooth Fairy. Since children have absolute faith in their parents does this simple untruth in the guise of tradition subtly teach the child it is okay to lie if it makes people happy?? Most people can’t see their true future in specific terms. If you knew the date, time, and hour you were going to die would you be willing to follow tomorrow’s future events ?? Highly unlikely!! Society, in general, and relationships in particular can’t function in an orderly and efficient manner without lies. Our economy would wither if everyone knew the truth as in "This product is a clunker" and "This stock is destined for the financial toilet". Mankind can only function if lies are told and / or believed. That is the reason that whoever / whatever designed this universe wisely limited our mind to stereotypical thinking based on statistical analysis. Obviously working / looking outside the box is a non starter in spite of its’ perceived popularity in management circles . Our brain works on the principle of pattern analysis or management by exception. If you walk down the street you automatically notice the person that is not conforming to standards whether it be in the physical or mental realm. When you ask someone "How are you today" you want a patterned answer like "Fine" or "OK". You don’t want them to tell the truth and say something like "My wife just left me." "My seven children are on drugs" and "I need $1,000 or my bookie will kill me before 5:00 p.m.." The key to a successful marriage to a reasonably functioning individual is a stereotypical / patterned response to all questions. For instance you always say they are fashionable / handsome, have impeccable taste and have always been the most important thing to you since sliced bread. If you want career success you have to suck up (lie) to your superiors. Your superior is not interested in being reminded of a crappie decision (truth) or his management skills were learned from Vlad The Impaler (truth again). Truth would also lead to mass starvation. If everyone knew the truth about someone they wouldn’t be able to make any money as they either wouldn’t be hired or alternately would be locked up as a future menace to society!! Therefore, it is easily seen that lies and hopefully still bigger, believable lies are essential for true and continuing success!!

Last Steps To Success

Lets see, Life, Relationships, Shit. What is left??? Oh, yeah Success!! I am thoroughly convinced that the universe is based on strict mathematical principles. You know, the old (1 + 1 = 2) kind of thing providing you are counting in the 10’s system. Personally, I have never been successful in business because I could never figure out what giving more than 100% really meant beyond a motherhood statement like "Study more" , "Study harder" etc. I was staring at the alphabet one day and it suddenly hit me between the eyes!! Here’s what I discovered!!!

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:
H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND,

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while Hard Work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the Bullshit and Ass Kissing that will pull you up the corporate ladder. You may think that Bullshit and Ass Kissing is a little over the top but when you stop and think about it the human race as a stereotypical group is highly insecure. That’s where Ass Kissing comes in as a confidence builder for management. It gives them a sense that they are on track. Bullshit is a little harder to quantify. You don’t want to appear insincere as that habit is a career breaker. It is best to give it an innocuous name like Better Business Bureau as an example or BBB for short if you want to appear to "belong". Of course BBB can also stand for Bullshit Baffles Brains but that is a story for another day.